My Fema (grandmother) who taught me to take pleasure in the little things, the important things in life and who my most cherished childhood memories are with. She will forever remain in my heart and in my thoughts.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Movin On Up-ish

Well we're movin on up-ish
To the east north west side
To a deluxe better than we have now and only renting it to save money to buy a house apartment in the sky better part of Cypress
Movin on up-ish
To the east north west side
We finally got a piece of the pie our own master bathroom... 

Remember The Jeffersons.  I loved The Jeffersons.  Just like them (only not) we are Movin On Up-ish.  We found a cute little 3 bedroom apartment in Cypress (yes it's the good part...shut it).  It is big enough for now and has room for the kids to play outside and for Gail's BBQ...because I haven't heard quite enough of her "If I had my BBQ" whining.  Like an extra appendage that BBQ is.  There are only 7 others in the complex so it is small which means less people for me to mock and less people for me to ignore.  Not that I'm uppity or anything, I just don't like the general public; people in my business.  I never could have made it back in the 50's and 60's when everyone was all neighborly and "Can I borrow a cup of sugar?" or "Oh, by the way I signed for your package since you were out."  I would have been all rake shaking at the kids who dreaded passing my door. 

Anyway as I was saying it is big enough for now.  It has no dish washer which is really ok since I am always obsessing if they really got the dishes clean and resort to redoing them myself.  What I like is that it has glass shower doors in both bathrooms as to the cloth ones you buy, so that saves me a trip checking behind them before I go to bed.  Think what you will of me but behind a shower curtain is a very good spot for a murderer to hide and plot my stabby death while I sleep.  Behind a shower door not so much because they are see through.  This way of thinking is also why I have to sleep with lots of covers, because it's a known fact that people can not murder you when you have lots of covers on. 

So we will be moving at the end of the month and have packed a whole lot of nothing.  However, we have thought about packing and have moved things from one place to another...if that counts. 

So this post has been kind of long, yes?  So let's recap:
1.  Moving (sans The Jeffersons).
2.  Gail can stop whining and have her BBQ
3.  Never would have made it in the 50's or 60's
4.  Can't trust dish washers
5.  Glass shower doors and lots of covers = no stabby or any other kinds of murder
6.  Zero, zilch, nada progress on the packing thing

P.S.  I'm getting a cat.  Don't tell Gail, ok?

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Going To The Ladies Room...An Olympic Event

I can't really complain about my job (although I do...frequently).  I love what I do, I have great hours and work for an awesome company doing awesome stuff no this is not a paid advertisement.  With that being said, they have completely lost their minds.  Part of our building is under construction.  THE PART WITH THE LADIES ROOM!!!  So I have to go OUTSIDE down the sidewalk to the stop sign around the STREET corner down the sidewalk and into another building to pee!  Here's a bit of nice information:  Do you know it was raining yesterday?  Did you know it was windy as hell?  Did you know I already occupy a building with NO heat that is older than the Roosevelt Administration and when I use my plug in heater it shorts the breakers leaving me in the dark!  No I bet you didn't.  Are you ready for is 240 STEPS to the ladies room..oh yes...I counted; yes I realize I am only 4'9" hence the title of the blog, clever, yes?  and one of oh, everyone else's steps is like 3 of mine but the point is still very valid.  Does this not sound like employee abuse (is there such a thing)?  What if I get hit by a car going to the ladies room?  What if I get struck by lightning?  What if I get kidnapped?  Then they'll be sorry.  They'll be like:

Them:  Hey, Erin did you get a response on the hotel bid?
Me:  No response (because I was hit by lightning on the way to the ladies room)
Them:  Did you get the E-mail, we need the bid ASAP!
Me:  No response (because I was hit by lightning then ran over by a car on the way to the ladies room)
Them:  Ring, ring...voicemail: Hey Erin we sent you an e-mail we didn't hear back and want to remind you   
           we need that hotel bid today, give me a call.  Thanks.
Me:  Only crickets heard (because I was hit by lightning, ran over by a car and my almost lifeless body was
        kidnapped and is now dead laying in a ditch so I guess the answer you need about the hotel bid is just
        going to have to wait.)

Things to do:  1.  Research if there is such a thing as employee abuse
                     2.  Report my own murder case before the next ladies room trip (nature/vehicular/serial killer  

Monday, February 8, 2010

Best Song Ever in the Whole of My Life!


Now I've heard there was a secret chord
That David played and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for
Music do you?
It goes like this
The fourth, the fifth
The minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah


Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you
She tied you
To a kitchen chair
She broke your throne, and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Baby I've been here before
I know this room, I've walked this floor
I used to live alone until I knew you
I've seen your flag on the marble arch
Love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

There was a time you let me know
What's really going on below
But now you never show it to me, do you?
And remember when I moved in you
The holy dove was moving too
And every breathe we drew was Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

You say I took the name in vain
I don't even know the name
But if I did, well really, what's it to you?
There's a blaze of light
In every word
It doesn't matter which you heard
The holly or the broken Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

I did my best, it wasn't much
I couldn't feel, so I tried to touch
I've told the truth, I didn't come to fool you
And even though
It all went wrong
I'll stand before the Lord of song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

-Leonard Cohen

Monday, February 1, 2010

is a wee post

This is not a very long post; in fact it is a very short post.  Now, you need to pay attention because this post is probably the most important post you will ever see in the whole of your life.  Are you paying attention?

                                       I HAZ A NEW HAT!!!

iz 2 shades, 17 years and 1 AARP card away from the Red Hat Society